The Insidious Take Down


I happens so gradually, you don’t understand what is happening.  While it seems to others like he is bragging about your latest accomplishment, you somehow understand what he is really saying:  shut it down.  This is way too much about you.

So there is the stress of being on eggshells on all times, coupled with the silent messages, and of course we get sick and fall apart.

When my ex pulled up into the drive way to pick up his son for a ride to the airport, he was driving the brand new Cadillac he leased.  I drive a 2008 Rogue that has damage to every panel.   During the past 2 years I’ve gotten fairly good at shrugging off his blatant financial prowess, while I can’t even shop the Marshalls clearance rack.    This new car though, got to me.  And by the night, I was running a fever.

I now accept that there is a connection between my emotions and my health, and I am really fucking pissed.  There have been years chiseled off of my life by my narc, and he hasn’t earned that.  More importantly, I don’t deserve that!

Before you say “karma is a bitch” or “he’ll get his”  HE WON’T!  he’s a covert narc, and he will always find another victim.  He will always find a new person to suck the life out of.

So, 1 more day in bed for me, then I’m back at it.  Telling him FUCK YOU, You won’t suck me dry anymore.  Give it a try asshole; I’m ready  for you.

It will come.  The fact that I was the successful one, I helped you pay off your debt, I financed your business.  I can bide my time.  My question is:  Can You???



One thought on “The Insidious Take Down

  1. OH BOY can I relate to this? 150% You and I could talk for hours regarding this. I cried a lot this weekend from dropping my kids off to his new home with his new beautiful girlfriend and his new exotic car in the driveway- while I pulled away in my 2000 Honda Civic to my old apartment with it completely empty. I laid on the couch in tears thinking about it all and the only take away I have is that I am much healthier then he is or will ever be. His girlfriend and him will break up again within a few months and my kids consider my old apartment more of a home then his ever will be. I am always reminded of him and his ways and it still hurts but I am getting healthier away from him everyday. I look forward to reading more of your blog. Thank you. Hang in there!


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