Rhianna sums it up.

You Put on Quite a Show

It’s really entertaining…..

 

For me this has been one of the most difficult aspects of the relationship with the covert narc to come to terms with.  The idea that it was all just a show, that he actually had no feelings for me, that all of his words and actions were carefully crafted tactics to keep me engaged and at his bidding…….well, I struggle with it every day.

Honestly, the only thing that enables me to believe this is his New Girl.  The fact that he walked away from our 25 years, right into the arms of another, for whom he professed his love, is really all the proof I should need.  What type of person advertises his New Girl to his children, his extended family, his business, his community, within a month of leaving his 25 year relationship?  What sort of person can’t spend time alone with his children; instead requires the aid of a woman to be with his boys?  What sort of person celebrates the day he left his 25 year relationship by taking the New Girl away for the weekend and canceling his visitation with his children?

Ultimately, I’m grateful to her.  Without her I’d still be in doubt about what I’ve been dealing with all these years.  Without her he might be behaving in a somewhat honorable way, leading me to question what we had.  Without her I might actually believe he’s all he said, the faithful, God loving, steadfast man of my dreams.

With her, I see him for the philandering, agnostic, self-obsessed person he is.  She has show me, in no uncertain terms, what he is capable of; what he did to me, what he’ll do to her, what he’s done to countless others during our marriage.

Gosh…….maybe I should thank her?

 

Adultery comes from 1 person putting themselves above the other.