I didn't understand the power of words until I started recovering from narcissistic abuse. My therapist started dissecting my language, and slowly I learned how toxic the narc (and other disordered people) are in their use of language. I had put this issue aside until a co-worker started going through the separation/divorce process. She started … Continue reading Words and Narcissistic Abuse
lies
Surviving Divorce from the Narcissist
I have a good friend with whom I share many of my inner most thoughts, pretty or not. One of these thoughts was the idea that I wanted to "win" my divorce. I've decided (hopefully) that this is a very human, not at all unusual thought, especially among those who have been abused. It was … Continue reading Surviving Divorce from the Narcissist
Be Proactive with Narcissist
I was advised, early in my divorce, to take control of the process. Close accounts, force issues, freeze assets, etc. I didn't, because I was conditioned to not threaten my narcissist. I had been taught to think that revenge would be horrible. I say conditioned because in retrospect, I can count on 1 hand the … Continue reading Be Proactive with Narcissist
Cheaters & Liars
Strange story - in the last episode of the Connor's Jackie figured out that her boyfriend was cheating on her, and she kicked him to the curb. Watching this took me down memory lane. Everything he says to her is something my ex said to me. Things like: if you accuse me of cheating you're … Continue reading Cheaters & Liars
Love Bombing
Dirty John While I've accepted that I was love bombed by a covert narcissist, I still struggle with how it happened. In retrospect, everything was so clear. His actions did not match his words, he lied to everyone around him in order to see me, he went through jobs like others go through socks and … Continue reading Love Bombing
Sweaty McSweaterson
I don't often answer my phone. When it rings, I look at it. If it's a caller I don't know, I hit silence and go about my business. If it is someone I do know I make a conscious choice to talk or ignore them. At times during my divorce proceedings, my lawyer was among … Continue reading Sweaty McSweaterson
The Tractor
Him He pulled up to the house in his Cadillac. He parked it on the street and checked the carport to make sure she wasn’t home. He caressed the car as he left it, filled with pride that it was his, reveling in the fact that while she would have fought against its purchase, she … Continue reading The Tractor
Lies, Misrepresentation, and General Run Around
I am on medicare, and I have a number of health conditions, each requiring brand name medications. I pay $83.90/month for additional prescription coverage. I won't go into the details of medicare, except to say that when they have paid a certain amount, you enter what they call the "coverage gap". At this point you … Continue reading Lies, Misrepresentation, and General Run Around
The Narcissist and Words
Two weekends ago my son was with his narcissistic father. When my son came home he told me he had not worked either of the 2 shifts he'd been scheduled for at his job. Needless to say he was subsequently fired. Today he started a new job. He is training tonight and tomorrow, and … Continue reading The Narcissist and Words
The Final Years of an Aging Narcissist
I hope I don't burn in hell for writing this...... I had an uncle who lived about 1.5 hours away from me. He was a flamboyant narcissist. He and his wife would come to my town every month or so, sit at my kitchen table and rattle on, telling me the same stories of their … Continue reading The Final Years of an Aging Narcissist
Groomed but Escaped 