Toilet Seats & The Narcissist

As far as I can tell, there are 2 types of boys in the world:  those that put the seat down and those who don’t.  My boys put the seat down, except in their own bathroom, when their girlfriends are not around.  I take no credit for this.  In fact, I think it is an anti-reaction to their dad, who not only didn’t put the seat down, but also claimed, frequently, that the woman should lift the seat up for the man.  This led to me falling into the toilet in the wee hours of the morning, while 7 months pregnant.  Not surprisingly, it also led to me loudly drop the toilet seat every time I had to go at night and the seat was up.  Yes, passive aggressive, but my only recourse.

Here’s the thing that it seems most men understand:  Women Sit Down To Pee.  Men Do Not.  Therefore, women need the seat put down to avoid falling into the toilet.  Men suffer  no such ill effect if the seat is down when they have to pee.  There is no chance they will fall in to the toilet; unless I’m misunderstanding anatomy, which after raising 3 boys I’m fairly certain I am not.


Lesson – if you hear your man “suggest” that it is your job to put the seat up, or insinuate that it is sexist for you to request he put the seat down, Walk Away!  He has a problem with women.


If you don’t walk away, prepare to clean yourself up after falling into the toilet on a dark, cold night.

Trust me – it’s not as fun as it sounds.



PS:  The seat in my bathroom is always down now.  But I still check.  How crazy is that??


3 thoughts on “Toilet Seats & The Narcissist

  1. Noooooooooo. Dude… You’re an ADULT. If you can’t LOOK before going to relieve yourself, then I don’t know what to say.


    • First of all, I’m not a dude. Secondly, I’m guessing you’ve never gotten up at 2AM, 8 months pregnant, and fell into the toilet. I’m guessing that if you have a girl in your life she won’t be happy for long.


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