Shadow Self-Narcissist Fuel

  If you are connected to a narcissist, you probably wrestle with your shadow self.  Some aspects of our shadow self are survival instincts no longer necessary to survive.  The most toxic parts of our shadow self though come from parents.  If you were raised by a narcissist or other disordered person, you have been  … Continue reading Shadow Self-Narcissist Fuel

Rage

(see update at bottom)   I grew up with people subject to rage, and then married a man who did the same thing.  Here's the thing about rage: it's all about control.  Rage is not an expression of anger, it is a show put on by a disordered person, designed to flip the script; to … Continue reading Rage

Actions Speak Louder Than Words

I have struggled with my bosses.  According to my therapist, I am expecting people who have consistently demonstrated that they don't have my back, to have my back.  An old pattern of mine,  and the definition of crazy! This weekend was my Ovarian Cancer walk.  The walk is held by a foundation I support all … Continue reading Actions Speak Louder Than Words

How to Spot a Narcissist/Toxic Person

I was talking to my cousin, and she told me about a group of "friends" she and her husband had enjoyed over the years.  Initially they shared a common bond - Marching Band.  In case you are unfamiliar, being a Band Parent is practically a full time job.  A lack of funds means the parents … Continue reading How to Spot a Narcissist/Toxic Person

Why It’s so Easy for the Narc to Screw Us

When I went to settlement, unloading the "home" I'd owned with my ex- narcissist, I found out that I was being held solely responsible for all outstanding fees, interest, and penalties on our mortgage.  Having been put through the wringer by Bank of America I was pissed off.  I wrote my lawyer  explaining everything BoA … Continue reading Why It’s so Easy for the Narc to Screw Us

How Did Your Ex Introduce His Paramour to Your Children?

(As always, substitute her if you are a guy) I thought it might be fun for some of us regulars to share how our ex introduced his adulterer to our kids.  I'll go first.  I'll tell it from my point of view and his point of view (his in red.  Like Scarlet Letter Red) ME: … Continue reading How Did Your Ex Introduce His Paramour to Your Children?

Overt Versus Covert Narcissist

The Circus versus the Magician I just spent time with my uncle, a bon-a-fide covert narcissist of the somatic sub-type (obsessed with his looks & physical prowess).  I had planned to work on implementing boundaries, but it took little time to realize I was fighting a losing battle.   At the end of my time … Continue reading Overt Versus Covert Narcissist