When my spouse 1st left me and gave me his proposal for support and division of property, I was horrified. It was so clear that his intent was to walk away and wash his hands of responsibility for me and his children. It was such a horrible offer, I didn't even consider it. How stupid … Continue reading What Was I Thinking?
feelings
Let’s Talk FaceBook
A few background facts: I own a restaurant with my soon to be ex (stbx). My savings and good credit partially funded it, I helped open it, I did the books for years, and I showed up when it was understaffed and waited tables. My stbx cheated on me repeatedly during out marriage. He was … Continue reading Let’s Talk FaceBook
Delusion, Meet Reality
I am surrounded by well meaning family & friends, all of whom want the best for me. I am also part of a yoga community, which wants the best for everyone, and I belong to cancer and divorce support groups on FB. All of these sources together have thrust me into a world of delusion, … Continue reading Delusion, Meet Reality
People Pleaser: Time To Reform
http://yoganonymous.com/the-dark-side-of-people-pleasing This is a whole new take on People Pleasing behavior. This is something I've done my whole life; except when I've gone off the rails, which I've also done! It seems to me that there has to be a middle ground between people pleasing and losing it, checking out, ranting, and I think I've … Continue reading People Pleaser: Time To Reform
What’s Left of Me?
It's ironic that I have a Master's degree in Psychology but had no real idea what the buzzwords actually meant. Words like emotional abuse, projection, dissociation, and denial, all so relevant to the therapeutic process, were only concepts; ideas I could define but not really relate to. It's a good thing I decided not to … Continue reading What’s Left of Me?
The Covert Narc’s Son
I kicked out my middle son today. Actually, I gave him several months to work things out, to start helping himself and to stop treating me like shit. When nothing changed, I gave him a month's notice to go. I should be wracked with guilt, but I'm not. I'm relieved. I know it's possible I'll … Continue reading The Covert Narc’s Son
I Have A Feeling Hangover
I have a feeling hangover! Two years ago, when I started with my therapist, she said (and I repeatedly read) "you have to feel your feelings to get past them. You have to walk through them and FEEL them". I said WTF does that mean? I feel my feelings. I get sad, I cry, … Continue reading I Have A Feeling Hangover
Forgiveness: Not For The Narcissist
I'm feeling a bit angry right now. If you don't follow my blog, here's the key points to know: 1) I spent 25 years with, and am now divorcing, a covert narcissist 2) Yoga has become one of my coping techniques 3) I live in a small community, and me & the ex-narc have … Continue reading Forgiveness: Not For The Narcissist
The Magic of the Covert Narcissist
It's like magic, what the covert narcissist (CN) does to your head. Today is a great example of how it works. I started my day feeling pretty good. I felt strong, capable, not bad looking for my age, and, believe it or not, Happy. I went to yoga and saw people who I feel … Continue reading The Magic of the Covert Narcissist
To Blog or Not To Blog
I can't decide if I want this blog to be successful or not. In fact, the day I had the most reads, I went into a panic. What if my ex reads this? What if my kids read this? What if my parents read this? What will they think? What will they say? How … Continue reading To Blog or Not To Blog
Groomed but Escaped 