Choice or Necessity?

I’ve just received a year’s worth of credit card statements from my Hopefully Soon To Be Ex.  He is claiming that these charges were necessary, paid by the line of credit on our house, and should be repaid prior to the division of profits from the sale of the home.

Once again I find myself asking the question:  Does his choice become my obligation?

These statements, which he paid from the line of credit secured by our home, are riddled with dinners out, airline tickets, movies, REI purchases, car payments, and ez-pass charges for his and the GF’s weekend trips.

I’ve known all of his activities, vacations, dinners out, etc, because my children tell me.  What I’m still trying to understand is how he could possibly think I should be partially responsible for them.   I didn’t go on these vacations, or attend these dinners or other events, so why on earth would I pay for them?  In fact, if you look at my credit card and bank statements what you will see is that I have cut back on All Spending since he moved out.  I’ve stopped eating out, vacations are out of the question, and if I go to the movies it’s the matinee which costs $6.50.

I’m honestly just curious at this point.  I’ve accepted that I’m screwed and that he will always get what he wants.  I am curious to see what the court makes of this.  Will they agree I’m partially liable for these expenses?  Quite frankly, it wouldn’t surprise me if they did.

In my mind the essential question is this:  is entertainment an essential expense?

If it is I have to totally revise my spending habits.  No more scrimping and saving for me, I’m taking the kids to Jamaica!

What is wrong with our system?


4 thoughts on “Choice or Necessity?

  1. Please dear Lord, make the courts see the insanity of this….Damn gurl – if you had known, what fun you could have been having (although you would have been wracked with guilt while he just feels more entitlement).
    Just goes to show – once a jackass, always a jackass.


  2. Entitled jackass – the perfect words. & yes, I have come to realize he’s a controlling bully who got his way by making me doubt myself or flat out scaring me. Wish I felt some of the sense of entitlement he feels!


    • I know what you mean. I always rolled over and let CF have his way, too. He had no idea what to do the first time I ever showed him my fangs. We are nice people, MurphyCee; that’s why it’s so easy to take advantage of us.


  3. I don’t know where you live but what I was told is if the funds are paying for household expenses then they are legitimate expenses. If they are paying for the mistress they are not legitimate expenses.

    Honestly, your soon to be ex sounds like an entitled jackass who is used to calling the shots and having you do whatever he tells you to do. I would definitely let the courts settle it. No way would I voluntarily agree to pay that crap off.


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