Going gray is considered the best, perhaps only way, to deal with narcissists and other toxic people. I thought I had it down with my ex, but I did not. I wasn't going gray, I was simply avoiding him. Since we live in the same community, and share numerous friends and associates, avoiding him is … Continue reading Going Gray with Narcissists/Toxic People
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How to Spot a Narcissist/Toxic Person
I was talking to my cousin, and she told me about a group of "friends" she and her husband had enjoyed over the years. Initially they shared a common bond - Marching Band. In case you are unfamiliar, being a Band Parent is practically a full time job. A lack of funds means the parents … Continue reading How to Spot a Narcissist/Toxic Person
Why It’s so Easy for the Narc to Screw Us
When I went to settlement, unloading the "home" I'd owned with my ex- narcissist, I found out that I was being held solely responsible for all outstanding fees, interest, and penalties on our mortgage. Having been put through the wringer by Bank of America I was pissed off. I wrote my lawyer explaining everything BoA … Continue reading Why It’s so Easy for the Narc to Screw Us
Feelings – Go Away Please!
If you read my blog you know that my bosses son died 2 weeks ago. It was a tragic loss, yet my boss and her family handled it beautifully. She and her husband gave their son's Eulogy, and it was touching, poignant, funny and inspiring. And it triggered the shit out of me. (does this … Continue reading Feelings – Go Away Please!
A Letter To My Son(s)
I had dinner with 2 of my sons tonight. One is turning 25 in a few weeks, and he told me his plan. He wants to rent a party bus which will take a bunch of people around the city for a safe night of partying. He mentioned it because he wanted to know - … Continue reading A Letter To My Son(s)
Who Must Bridge The Divide?
How do I put this into words......... While I am not proud of how I behaved, last weekend I finally lost it with my parents. After spending the past year, hell - my entire life - trying to keep them happy, do the "right" thing, meet their needs, I lost it. I was accused of … Continue reading Who Must Bridge The Divide?
Change
Change I watch the ripples change their size but never leave the stream of warm impermanence and so the days float through my eyes but still the days seem the same. David Bowie August August represents the end of carefree days and overfilled late summer nights, the end of freedom. As a child, August was … Continue reading Change
It’s About Community
Isolation = the narcissists greatest weapon The narcissist slowly separates you from all the people you once knew. Zooming in on your natural ambivalence towards your family and friends, the narcissist highlights the negatives of all around you; becomes your "protector" against them. If that isn't enough, he stands between you and who ever … Continue reading It’s About Community
A Dress for My Ex’s Funeral
This is probably really bad for my karma but....... For Mother's day my eldest son and his GF took me to brunch at a restaurant in the city. The restaurant didn't take reservations, so we wandered around while waiting for our table. The section of the city is the current up and coming area, … Continue reading A Dress for My Ex’s Funeral
The Crime of Emotions
I was just told by my father "you always do this - you don't stop and think things through, then later you say 'oh, I wish I had done this differently'". Why did he say this? Because he didn't like a decision I've made. I asked him for some examples, and he started to … Continue reading The Crime of Emotions
Groomed but Escaped 