"We are getting divorced and you need to decide who you want to live with". This was the opening statement from my father during a "family meeting". My three siblings immediately said they wanted to go with him. I have no idea what I said. By this age (early tween) I was an expert at … Continue reading The Intentionality of Narcissistic Rage
victim
Divorcing a Narcissist: The Aftermath
In the US we are currently witnessing a narcissistic, powerful, wealthy man lose his status. Many have wondered if his young wife will divorce him. My children were laughing about how well off she'd be if she did divorce him. Having divorced a narcissist, I'm very aware of the price we pay, and the actual … Continue reading Divorcing a Narcissist: The Aftermath
The Narcissistic Father
I thought I would feel vindicated when my children finally figured out their narcissistic father. Instead, I just feel sad. The younger two have known for a while who and what their dad is. Not much has changed for them. My eldest is the one I've worried about. My ex always spent the most … Continue reading The Narcissistic Father
Rage
(see update at bottom) I grew up with people subject to rage, and then married a man who did the same thing. Here's the thing about rage: it's all about control. Rage is not an expression of anger, it is a show put on by a disordered person, designed to flip the script; to … Continue reading Rage
Long Term Impact of Narcissist
I had a very difficult winter. If you read my blog regularly you might have noticed I stopped writing. I was struggling with a lingering virus (remember-if you are the victim of a narcissist your health is compromised), but that was not the whole story. I am increasingly aware of the long term impact of … Continue reading Long Term Impact of Narcissist
Be Proactive with Narcissist
I was advised, early in my divorce, to take control of the process. Close accounts, force issues, freeze assets, etc. I didn't, because I was conditioned to not threaten my narcissist. I had been taught to think that revenge would be horrible. I say conditioned because in retrospect, I can count on 1 hand the … Continue reading Be Proactive with Narcissist
Sweaty McSweaterson
I don't often answer my phone. When it rings, I look at it. If it's a caller I don't know, I hit silence and go about my business. If it is someone I do know I make a conscious choice to talk or ignore them. At times during my divorce proceedings, my lawyer was among … Continue reading Sweaty McSweaterson
Cheating Narcissist
Funny story...... My ex recently changed his job. He told our son that he was doing it because he wouldn't have to work weekends, and would have every other Friday off. Lo and behold, he's now working every Friday & every weekend. My son told me this when I asked how he gets to work … Continue reading Cheating Narcissist
Acting, Lies & the Narcissist
My youngest son drove me to a Dr's appointment tonight. It's often illuminating spending time with captive children, and tonight did not disappoint. My son has recently started working as a cashier in the market down the street from our home. While waiting for my prescription, he launched into a tirade about how much … Continue reading Acting, Lies & the Narcissist
How to Spot a Narcissist/Toxic Person
I was talking to my cousin, and she told me about a group of "friends" she and her husband had enjoyed over the years. Initially they shared a common bond - Marching Band. In case you are unfamiliar, being a Band Parent is practically a full time job. A lack of funds means the parents … Continue reading How to Spot a Narcissist/Toxic Person
Groomed but Escaped 