At the age of 35, shortly after giving birth to my second son, I rolled in to my "journey" of disability. I strapped on my roller blades, something I'd done a thousand times before, but, before I'd pushed off from my car, lost my breath. This was my first full blown asthma attack, and … Continue reading I Know I Look Good
shame
Toilet Seats
I need some lightening up so..... A while back I wrote a blog about toilet seats & narcissists. My narc never put the seat down. When I complained he said "I think you should have to put it up for me". When I pointed out that he wasn't likely to fall in he responded........with … Continue reading Toilet Seats
Projection
This is embarrassing to admit - even with a MA degree in Psychology I did not understand the power of projection. I loved studying Psychology but honestly, I approached it the way Catholics approach the bible. The ideas/stories in the bible, according to Catholicism, are metaphorical. I don't think I've ever heard a Catholic claim … Continue reading Projection
When Bad Things Happen To Bad People
I think it's called Karma? Background: The support my ex was stipulated to pay was increased, substantially, on 2/1 The amount he actually paid did not go up. At all. His response, when I asked him about it, was "that's between the state and my employer. I have nothing to do with it" I spent … Continue reading When Bad Things Happen To Bad People
Narcissists Feed On Shame
Shame is a new concept for me. I lived it, but I never understood it. From as early as I can remember I've felt a deep sense of shame, a belief that I was inherently such a bad human I deserved nothing. As a child I was called "practically perfect". My family thought this was … Continue reading Narcissists Feed On Shame
Thankyou, May I Have Another?
When I was young thin mint girl scout cookies were a big deal. During the cookie season, one night each week our dessert would be thin mints. On the thin mint nights here is what happened. Dad, sitting at the head of the table, would open a sleeve of cookies. He would give himself 3 … Continue reading Thankyou, May I Have Another?
It Is Not Your Fault
Divorcing A Narcissist I have just come to a divorce settlement with my covert narc (CN). It took almost 3 years, and it was hell. As I get over the constant fear I realize how bad it really was. The most important thing I've learned is this: This was not my fault. I was … Continue reading It Is Not Your Fault
Support Is Everything
I learned a valuable lesson this summer while surfing. I learned that without the proper support, I am doomed to failure, but with the proper support I am destined to succeed. Here's what happened. I've always wanted to surf. Last summer, as I sat on the beach watching my kids surf, I decided it … Continue reading Support Is Everything
Let’s Talk FaceBook
A few background facts: I own a restaurant with my soon to be ex (stbx). My savings and good credit partially funded it, I helped open it, I did the books for years, and I showed up when it was understaffed and waited tables. My stbx cheated on me repeatedly during out marriage. He was … Continue reading Let’s Talk FaceBook
My Stupid Inner Critic
At therapy this week my therapist said "we have to get rid of that inner critic, always putting you down" and the 1st thought that popped into my head was "I know. I'm so stupid for doing that". What a predicament! How can I get rid of the voice that constantly criticizes me, when I'm … Continue reading My Stupid Inner Critic