Reluctant Advocate

I've been thinking about how I got involved in ovarian cancer advocacy, and I thought what better place to tell my story.  Humiliating as it is! When I finally settled in to the fact that I had advanced stage cancer, requiring major surgery then 6 rounds of brutal chemo, I made a decision:  I was … Continue reading Reluctant Advocate

Swimming in a Sea Of Insanity

  “It hurts to look at the clouds, but it also helps, like most things that cause pain.” ― Matthew Quick, The Silver Linings Playbook When my middle son was a toddler he would ask me questions.  A lot of questions.  Questions I couldn't answer.  He didn't ask the usual unanswerable questions, like "why is … Continue reading Swimming in a Sea Of Insanity

When Bad Things Happen To Bad People

I think it's called Karma? Background: The support my ex was stipulated to pay was increased, substantially, on 2/1 The amount he actually paid did not go up.  At all. His response, when I asked him about it, was "that's between the state and my employer.  I have nothing to do with it" I spent … Continue reading When Bad Things Happen To Bad People

The Narcissist Never Changes. Get Used to It.

My ex, a covert narcissist, took a low paying job rather than work for more in our business.  He did this just as it was time to start support negotiations.  He claims he is selling our business (a restaurant) because he has to work too many hours, and he's getting too old - he needs … Continue reading The Narcissist Never Changes. Get Used to It.

Maneuvering Around the Narcissist

Bear with me - I am going to think this out as I write it. The narcissist thinks only of himself. If you are reading this you can't really grasp this.  You are so busy thinking of everyone around you it makes no sense that the narc could care less.  The only way I've come … Continue reading Maneuvering Around the Narcissist

Practical or Petulant?

My house is not selling as quickly as I'd hoped.  I'm fairly certain it is just overpriced and will sell as soon as we drop the price.  Others  think I need to spend some money on repairs to get it to sell. Yesterday my cousin, who did most of the repairs in the house this … Continue reading Practical or Petulant?

The Narcissist & Quicksand

Occasionally I find a subject that fascinates me, and I spend hours learning about it.  Mt. Everest and Fairy Circles are two examples.  Ask me anything - I probably know the answer.  Today I am pondering quicksand.  The more I learn about it the more similarities I find between quicksand and the narcissist. You don't … Continue reading The Narcissist & Quicksand

Thankyou, May I Have Another?

When I was young thin mint girl scout cookies were a big deal.  During the cookie season, one night each week our dessert would be thin mints.    On the thin mint nights here is what happened. Dad, sitting at the head of the table, would open a sleeve of cookies.  He would give himself 3 … Continue reading Thankyou, May I Have Another?

How Did Your Ex Introduce His Paramour to Your Children?

(As always, substitute her if you are a guy) I thought it might be fun for some of us regulars to share how our ex introduced his adulterer to our kids.  I'll go first.  I'll tell it from my point of view and his point of view (his in red.  Like Scarlet Letter Red) ME: … Continue reading How Did Your Ex Introduce His Paramour to Your Children?

Actions To Take When Divorcing A Narcissist

How To Survive Divorcing a Narcissistic Asshole In the Order You'll Face Them (I say guy, could be girl) If you are like me, you are heading in to a divorce with someone you suspect is a Bad Guy, perhaps  a narcissist.  Trust me when I tell you:  If you suspect it, it is true. … Continue reading Actions To Take When Divorcing A Narcissist