Being romanced? Tune out the words and look at the actions.

His words told me that all he wanted was a nice quiet family life, with a woman he loved and children who adored him. His words said all he needed was to come home at night to family dinners, then watch some family shows before bed time, at which time he’d pull out his current novel and read till lights out. He words told me that all he desired on weekends was to get through household chores, and move on to family time and church. His words told me he believed in children doing chores, and fidelity and frugality. I believed it all. I watched his actions, yet believed his words.

His actions were different. While I watched him sneak around, I listened to his words.

When he called me at 3 in the afternoon and said “She thinks I’m going to home depot. Meet me at the mall” I saw the family man, a tortured soul, unable to leave his poor child despite his psychopath wife, not a cheating ass who had no compassion for anyone other than himself.

When he knocked on my apartment door late at night, unannounced, I reveled in the fact that he sought me out in all his despair, that I was the one who gave him comfort in his hour of need, ignoring the reality that he couldn’t bother with calling ahead or asking my permission.

When he told me stories of his wife’s reckless spending I ignored the fact that he had just bought me lunch and himself a new pair of sneakers. I believed his words.

I forgot that Actions Speak Louder than Words.