I am a Human Pathology Detector. I have found that if someone is psychologically normal, or healthy, I am automatically put on guard. I feel awkward, shy and inept around them. I don't want to spend time with them, and I will go out of my way to avoid them. If, however, some one is … Continue reading Human Pathology Detector
Wake Up Gurl!
Funny Story About Manners
When my ex was divorcing his 1st wife, and in the years that followed since they have a child together, she would write to him and always say Hi X, blah, blah, blah. Hope all is well. Thanks, Y. Generally, these letter would involve an issue, because the only time she would write … Continue reading Funny Story About Manners
Lies
It's all bullshit. Here's a list of the lies I've been living: That I can be more then what I am right now. I can't. I am not the person who stands up for herself. I'm not the person who looks a bully in the eye and says don't talk to me that way. I'm … Continue reading Lies
Are We Victims?
I had my 2nd EMDR session on Tuesday. As successful as the 1st one was, the 2nd one was equally unsuccessful. The week before I felt able to share freely, I held nothing back, and what I shared was genuine and authentic to me. This week, it felt forced. I felt like I was reaching … Continue reading Are We Victims?
I’m One Bad-Ass Chick
It's been 1 year, 329 days since my husband of 23 years came into the kitchen, looked me in the eye and said "I want a divorce. I don't love you. Would you like me to make your eggs for you?" I've come a long way since that day, yet still, 1 innocent sentence uttered … Continue reading I’m One Bad-Ass Chick
Truth Eliminates Confusion
What a simple but profound premise! I get daily emails from a FB group called the Brave Girls Club. The purpose of the site, and the emails, is to empower women who don't feel very powerful. Today's email said, in part, "Truth feels good and peaceful and warm, even when the truth is a … Continue reading Truth Eliminates Confusion
Overcoming Parenting with A Narcissist
I chose the word overcoming because I just realized the extent to which I've been marginalized by my ex narc. Marginalized is also a strong word, and I have included it quite deliberately, because when you read the definition, "the process whereby someone is pushed to the edge of a group and accorded less importance", … Continue reading Overcoming Parenting with A Narcissist
Dinner With The Covert Narc
The 1st time I had dinner at my ex's home I was surprised. My ex bragged about his father constantly. According to him, his father was his idol. He was a perfect father, husband, employee and Deacon. He was always on the go, leaving at 7AM for work, stopping home for a 15 minute dinner … Continue reading Dinner With The Covert Narc
Instead of Breaking
The glassblower knows: while in the heat of beginning, any shape is possible. Once hardened, the only way to change is to break. The Book of Awakening, Mark Nepo That is the opening passage for February 19. I am much further along in the book (started reading it daily last April) so I'm not even sure … Continue reading Instead of Breaking
My Go-To Sites: Education is the Key
Recovering from narcissistic abuse requires knowledge. You have to understand what you were up against, how you got there, why you are so confused, what is real and what is not, and where to go from here. Some of my favorite resources are: https://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/the-legacy-distorted-love/201412/is-your-partner-narcissist-here-are-50-ways-tell http://ladywithatruck.com/the-3-phases-of-a-relationship-with-a-narcisist/ http://www.healthyplace.com/blogs/yourmentalhealth/2015/10/15/recovering-from-narcissistic-abuse-without-validation/ http://relationshipedia.me/ http://www.narcissismaddictionsabuse.com/index.html http://thenarcissisticlife.com/victims-of-npd-relationships-stages-of-recovery/ http://christinehammondcounseling.com/2015/01/13/how-narcissists-use-money-to-abuse/ https://www.psychopathfree.com/content.php?298-Working-Through-Rage-After-Abuse https://www.psychotherapy.net/article/complex-ptsd#section-emotional-neglect:-a-primary-cause-of-complex-ptsd? http://counsellingresource.com/features/2009/02/24/shame-guilt-neurotic-manipulation/ … Continue reading My Go-To Sites: Education is the Key
Groomed but Escaped 