Today, on my 55th birthday, I find myself looking back at what I expected my life to look versus what is does look like. What I expected was a career as a Psychologist, living a fulfilling life helping others, while remaining single. What I got was very different. I wish I could blame it all … Continue reading Regrets
marriage
Divorce Attorneys: The Truth
I am cursed with the belief that when dealing with an adult, I'm being told the truth. I would think that by now I'd be over that, having been repeatedly lied to by my spouse, but no, I still take adults' words at face value. Given this, I believed my attorney when he expressed outrage … Continue reading Divorce Attorneys: The Truth
Are We Our Stuff?
I've spent the last 2 years selling, giving away and trashing most of my "stuff", and it feels great! I love how empty my house looks, I love the freedom I have now that I don't have to take care of so many things, and I love feeling unencumbered. I am still very tied down, … Continue reading Are We Our Stuff?
Let’s Talk FaceBook
A few background facts: I own a restaurant with my soon to be ex (stbx). My savings and good credit partially funded it, I helped open it, I did the books for years, and I showed up when it was understaffed and waited tables. My stbx cheated on me repeatedly during out marriage. He was … Continue reading Let’s Talk FaceBook
Delusion, Meet Reality
I am surrounded by well meaning family & friends, all of whom want the best for me. I am also part of a yoga community, which wants the best for everyone, and I belong to cancer and divorce support groups on FB. All of these sources together have thrust me into a world of delusion, … Continue reading Delusion, Meet Reality
My Stupid Inner Critic
At therapy this week my therapist said "we have to get rid of that inner critic, always putting you down" and the 1st thought that popped into my head was "I know. I'm so stupid for doing that". What a predicament! How can I get rid of the voice that constantly criticizes me, when I'm … Continue reading My Stupid Inner Critic
Mt. Everest
I've been writing about my recovery (much more than what I've posted) and it dawned on me that this Trek we are on, recovering from narcissistic abuse, might be similar to submitting Mt. Everest. Once the idea occurred to me I started reading up on Everest and I am stunned by much of what I … Continue reading Mt. Everest
Persistent or Tenacious?
I was once asked in a job interview if I considered myself persistent or tenacious. Having no idea what tenacious meant I answered persistent. When I got home and looked up the definition of tenacious, I realized I am usually tenacious; to a fault. Yesterday I was trying to print transfers for shirts and nothing … Continue reading Persistent or Tenacious?
Life Is Not Fair
Remember when we were kids and when we complained "life's not fair"? We'd hear "life's not fair, then you die". Turns out this is not a good thing to say to a child who's mother has cancer. I've said it a few times to my 14 year old, and I finally looked as … Continue reading Life Is Not Fair
I Deserved So Much Better
It's taken a long time to get here, but I finally get it - I replaced my dysfunctional birth family with a dysfunctional husband, and together, we created Dysfunction Central. I've known for a long time that we had problems; hence this blog. Truthfully though, I was more than happy to take the blame for … Continue reading I Deserved So Much Better
Groomed but Escaped 